You have prawn crackers in London, yeah? They’re basically giant crisps. What will they think of next? Bloody marvellous!

Wow this was bad. I’ll admit I was curious about having Yvonne as a lead, and to be fair, Tracy-Ann Oberman is great in this, but everything else is pretty horrendous to say the least. Uninteresting plot, a cast filled with caricatures, a reveal you see coming 20 minutes early, and frankly…nothing to latch onto.
But the most unforgivable crime is retconning Boris Johnson getting killed by the Autons.

Mmh, I prefer Sky Butler…

I can’t exactly say I was engrossed in the whole Ephraim Salt plotline, but this is a story that is carried by its two leads. Gareth David-Lloyd is brilliant in this, and goes to show how criminally underused Ianto was in the TV series.

The way he delivers some of these lines are hilarious, and his dynamic with Zeynep is what keeps the pace going. They somehow manage to make the world’s longest plane crash feel like 10 minutes, and I think there’s something admirable your characters having that kind of chemistry.

Hot buns.

Unfortunately, there just isn’t much to this story. It’s nice to have Eve Myles and Kai Owen back at it, with chemistry so good you’d never know that they left…but the plot didn’t exactly blow me away. It’s a rather uninteresting mystery, consisting of characters I don’t care about, and a John Barrowman-less Captan Jack?

I appreciate the idea, but having the drama revolve around senile old people, and children so young they can barely talk, just didn’t hook me in the way I think they were trying to.

If you put any of this in your blog, I’ll have you transported to a Siberian zinc mine by lunch-time tomorrow.

This story is just a bit of nothing. There’s nothing super captivating going on, or any revelations that stuck with me…however, John Barrowman and John Sessions give pretty engaging performances and have a good rapport with each other.

The concept of “The Committee” is interesting, but I feel that the truly compelling stuff is still to come.

I literally have nothing else in my life.

I suppose there isn’t a better compliment to give a Big Finish story than, “this should’ve been an actual episode”. This feels essential for not only understanding Ianto’s grief over Lisa’s death, but why he forgives Jack in the way that he does.

This is a tender glimpse into how we deal with trauma, and the relationship that one’s peers have in that dynamic. It can be hard to speak about the things that we need to, and the way we process that has ramifications that span far and wide. Reach out to the people in your life, they might need it.

Jiffing beef steak!

This is what I love about Torchwood. Grounded relationships, trudging through the good and the bad…and not to mention a spooky old time. I love these intimate horror stories with only a few characters, and an entity like the Jordia is inherently compelling. We don’t know what it looks like, what it wants, or what’s it’s even capable of in its entirety, and that’s why it works. This is Torchwood’s “Midnight”, and I’m here for it.

In a complex universe, you’re a constant.

A step up from the previous episode. I thought that the speech between Sam and Fiona in the finale was great, and the Doctor’s appreciation for the Brig was lovely…but the Cybermen plotline wasn’t anything to ride home about.

Lots of planets have a Scotland…tricky part is keeping hold of it.

It’s nice to see the Brig and Nine meet up, plus Jon Culshaw does an uncanny impression of Nicholas Courtney…but this episode is so all over the place and weirdly paced, that I found it a little difficult to follow.

Not a bad story, but definitely a messy one.

It’s a little slow to start, but really picks up by the end and proves that Pertwee really needed an “off Earth” story. I should’ve seen it coming, but The Master’s role and reveal did a lot for the adventure too.

It’s got an intriguing premise and I like Flynn’s character a lot, but the overall plot is slow and kind of predictable. No more malfunctioning killer “helper” robots please.