25.05.2022

Ugh. You can guess the main twist in the first 15 minutes of the play. The revolution subplot is brought up to be dismissed on a technicality. The day is saved by love (that wasn't there until the plot required it to be). A safe skip. 1/5

MR 018: The Stones of Venice

Uh... it's a Doctor Who story and stuff happens I guess. Really, these first few Eighth Doctor stories aren't that interesting.

The city of Venice is sinking into the ground in the future. But there's a whole legend around the Duke, who is 100 years old, having been cursed by his lover to die when the city sinks. Because he "lost her in a card game," which is a giant lol wut to me. This is your lover, not a car. And he gives no reason for it either which is bizarre. Surely that's not legal unless the 23rd century has legal slavery. This entire premise is bizarre.

A cult has formed to worship the lover and has her tomb deep underground. But her tomb is empty because she was never dead. She is an alien of some kind who used her jewels to amplify her hatred of the Duke and curse the city to die. But to save the city something has to die in return so she forgives the Duke and they die together.

Which is so weird. Why would she forgive him for "losing her in a game of cards," which I reiterate, makes no sense. And why would she choose to die with him, throwing herself on the funeral pyre style.

The Doctor talks about how humans make up legends and stories. But this REALLY IS a legend and story come to life. She did curse the Duke and the city to live for another hundred years and then die. There really is no reason for the cult to not worship her when she can destroy the entire city. There's also some paintings that she brought with her from space.

And an underclass of fish people who drive the gondolas. They're both supported and condemned by the story. Revolution of the underclass who force Charley into trying to fool the Duke that he is his long lost lover.

Yeah, the writing just feels all over the place here. That's the main problem. It's very unfocused and it ends up feeling like a mess of underbaked ideas.

The Monthly Adventures #018 - "The Stones of Venice" by Paul Magrs

Of all the writers in the Whoniverse (I wish there was a better term for that), the one I’ve been looking forward to getting into the most is Paul Magrs. A mad hat, entirely unique and possibly insane writer that has written both the most mental and the most revered stories in Doctor Who, created the beloved (and frankly, perplexing) character of Iris Wildthyme and has made a very loud name for himself in both prose and audio. The Stones of Venice seems to be a more regular story for him, devoid of Wildthymes and Mad Dogs and instead, a somewhat beautiful future-historical hybrid set in a sinking city.

Desperate for a break from all the running, shooting and ducking, the Doctor and Charley land in Venice, on the eve of its demise. But what truth lies behind a curse placed on the city? And what do the revolutionary plots of fishmen and a cult mean for Venice?

(CONTAINS SPOILERS)

The Stones of Venice is unlike pretty much any story I’ve listened to before. A gorgeously realised fairy tale set in 23rd Century Venice, which is beautifully portrayed through some utterly stellar sound design, that presents itself as this mediaeval/futuristic hybrid, with fishmen driving gondolas and aliens putting curses on the city. It's a mashup of genres that I haven’t really seen in Doctor Who before and I adore the whole fairytale vibe it’s going for, which I find reminiscent of something like Series 5, which coincidentally had an episode with fish people in Venice, though it did something a little different with the concept. No, this is a glorious end of days thrillride with the Doctor getting involved in the machinations of a cult worshipping the spirit of the woman who cursed the city and Charley impersonating said woman in order to allow the race of fish people to put a stop to the curse. I love plots where it’s a bunch of different threads that all collide at the end and The Stones of Venice does this wonderfully, both Charley and the Doctor get a good amount of airtime and I enjoy both narratives. This is probably because tagging along with these two is a really enjoyable side cast, everybody here feels like a well-developed character and I, dare I say it, liked a few of them.

If I had to level one complaint at this story, it would be that the middle dragged quite a bit. All the praise I give to this audio is aimed at parts 1 and 4, 2 and 3 are simply not much to write home about. The story really drags in the middle and it can get quite forgettable, but the setting and characters are good enough to keep my interest up until the final part. However, the twist of Mrs Lavish being Estella was somewhat predictable, not the best third act reveal I’ve seen in The Monthly Adventures by a long shot.

The Stones of Venice surprised me, as I liked it a lot more than I expected to. Definitely more fairy tale than science fiction but I don’t think that does it a disservice, the story and characters are interesting and it boasts one of the most unique settings I’ve seen in an audio. It’s just a little forgettable, that’s all.

7/10

Pros:

+ Wonderfully realised future Venice

+ Incredibly constructed and intricate soundscape

+ Complex and interesting narrative that builds to an effective climax

+ Interesting and varied side cast

Cons:

- The middle slows too much and drags its feet

- The final twist was predictable

Doctor Who – The Monthly Adventures

#018. The Stones of Venice ~ 10/10

◆ An Introduction

Italy is a nation with a rich cultural heritage – something I know after watching James May’s Our Man In Italy – so it should really come as no surprise that creatives and geniuses alike flock to the Bel Paese.

Venice has captured the hearts and minds of millions, with its centuries-old architecture, cobblestone alleys, a maze of eye-catching islands, and of course, the famous canals that run through it all.

But what happens when the city starts sinking into the swamp it’s built on? A love-sick aristocrat throws a knees-up, of course!

◆ Publisher’s Summary

The Doctor and Charley decide to take a well-deserved break from the monotony of being chased, shot at and generally suffering anti-social behaviour at the hands of others. And so they end up in Venice, well into Charley's future, as the great city prepares to sink beneath the water for the last time…

Which would be a momentous, if rather dispiriting, event to witness in itself. However, the machinations of a love-sick aristocrat, a proud art historian and a rabid High Priest of a really quite dodgy cult combine to make Venice's swansong a night to remember. And then there's the rebellion by the web-footed amphibious underclass, the mystery of a disappearing corpse and the truth behind a curse going back further than curses usually do. The Doctor and Charley are forced to wonder just what they have got themselves involved with this time…

◆ The Eighth Doctor

Paul Magrs is someone we tend to associate with comedic adventures – probably because he created that nutty nanna, Iris Wildthyme – but he can do much more sombre pieces like this one. He showcases an excellent understanding of the Eighth Doctor in ‘The Stones of Venice’.

I believe this was the first adventure recorded by this TARDIS team, which makes me doubly impressed! Paul McGann delivers an immaculate performance.

There is nothing he likes more than putting the kibosh on a really good vile regime. During his spare time, he likes to drink a cup of tea. The last time the Doctor was in Venice he watched the light from the palace windows spill onto the Grand Canal; all the stars looked as though they were trapped underwater, bursting to get out. He is sometimes downright rude, forgetting about things like good manners and introductions. The Doctor was here when the city was being built, when it still smelt like a swamp: now it smells of damp wool, but there is still a trace, a foretaste of the primordial world below. The Doctor informs Churchwell that he used to be terribly good at name-dropping and bluffing his way into places, but that he can’t do it for toffee these days. His TARDIS is trustworthy, watertight, and his best friend – it also happens to be extremely discreet, like him. Cults have never appealed to him because there are too many rules, and it’s all a bit solemn: going round in robes and chanting just isn’t for him. The Doctor doesn’t like the nastiness and people getting away with it. If he didn’t believe there was a way to put things right, he wouldn’t get out of bed in the morning, eat breakfast, or ever leave the TARDIS: he would never have left home in the first place!

◆ Charley Pollard

This probably should’ve been Charley’s first adventure through the fourth dimension, because she actually gets a fair bit to do. I wouldn't mind hearing Magrs pen another script for this TARDIS team, actually.

‘The Stones of Venice’ features an amazing performance from India Fisher.

Charley thinks that going somewhere peaceful, without being threatened with death every five minutes, would be rather nice. A traveller is certainly what she’d like to be, but her father wasn’t too keen on her striking out on her own. Her family would be suitably mollified at the thought of her travelling with the Doctor! Charley believes that, for a really futuristic ship, the TARDIS ought to have gleaming white surfaces and flashing controls… rather than looking like something from a Jules Verne novel. They were supposed to be going somewhere gorgeous on holiday, get out of that Gothic nightmare of a TARDIS. Instead, the Doctor has brought her somewhere horrible where everyone wants to die! Poor Charley was already sympathetic towards the web-footed gondoliers… but that doesn’t stop them drugging her, and making her play pretend as Estella!

◆ The Death of Venice

I previously mentioned that Paul Magrs is someone we tend to associate with comedic adventures – probably because he created that drunken trans-temporal adventuress, Iris Wildthyme – but he proves with this script that he can do something gorgeously sombre too.

People have come from across the globe for one final knees-up before Venice sinks into the primordial swamp forever. Meanwhile, the natives grieve the loss of this floating metropolis. We spend more time with the latter group, meaning the script is tinged with melancholy throughout: a beautiful sadness.

◆ The Venetians

Some people have been whinging that this doesn’t feel like a futuristic adventure, that despite being set in the dying days of the 23rd century, the setting and characters all feel more at home in the 18th. Some of you also claim that the story is more fairytale than science fiction. These are all valid complaints… which I don’t really care about! I’ll probably lose credibility as a reviewer for that stance – assuming I had any to begin with – but the characters just have so much personality to them.

The eccentric Duke Orsino laments the city’s sinking, but is far too busy arranging parties and hoping for his own death! He honestly reminds me of the Hedonism Bot from Futurama.

Vincenzo is a total head-case, and de facto leader of the Cult of Estella. He is quite easily one of the campiest villains imaginable, though that’s to be expected when you cast Mark Gatiss.

Churchwell is curator of the Duke’s private collection, and a second companion of sorts; a man who has such passion for art that he cares more about saving the collection than his own skin!

‘The Stones of Venice’ thrives because of its over-the-top characters who ooze personality and charisma. As much as I enjoyed the previous adventure, we cannot deny it featured little-to-no character development. This is a massive improvement.

◆ Sound Design

Venice has been the setting for many Doctor Who adventures, but Andy Hardwick makes the floating metropolis feel truly alive… ironic, considering it’s sinking into the primordial swamp!

The Doctor and Charley flee gunfire and explosions after freeing a civilisation from a vile regime. Tweeting birds accompany flowing water in the canals, whilst church bells chime throughout the city. Off in the distance, ignorant revellers party as Venice sinks into the depths. Water trickles down from the ceiling of a dungeon, used as the Cult of Estella’s headquarters. The distant sound of chanting cultists. Party music plays at the Duke’s grand ball, revellers celebrating what they believe to be their last night. As Venice begins sinking into the waters below, the city erupts into chaos; the gondoliers rise up and start fighting with Orsino’s swordsmen, fragments of masonry fall from buildings like warheads dropping out of the sky.

◆ Conclusion

“And the clocks chime out for the death of Venice!”

Paul Magrs is someone we associate with comedy adventures, but he went completely against expectations this time round, delivering a beautifully sombre piece about a floating metropolis sinking into the murky depths below.

Featuring an exquisite soundscape, characters that are pure camp, and some amazing performances, ‘The Stones of Venice’ should be considered an underrated classic!

😑20/50 = Underwhelming! = Not recommended!

Thworping through time and space, one adventure at a time!

THE ITALIAN JOB!

The opening sees the Doctor and Charley decide to take a holiday in Venice after getting tired of being shot at constantly. Part 1 then sets up the main conflict of a cult trying to resurrect a dead bride, which sees Eight paired with the annoying Churchwell and Charley given the generic companion role of getting into trouble.

By the end of Part 2, the narrative has barely progressed, and it is this slow pace and lack of excitement or tension that make this story a bit forgettable. However, Magrs brings the story to a satisfying conclusion with an emotional Part 4, which reveals the deeper love story behind the adventure.

Other than the stellar main cast, the only guest actor of note is Michael Sheard (Professor Scarman from Pyramids of Mars) as Count Orsino. Mark Gatiss is in there somewhere, but he doesn't stand out like he did in Phantasmagoria.

This one has a strange soundscape from the start and doesn't quite capture the feel of a future Venice about to be submerged. The sound mixing sounds a bit off for me, as there is a strange echo to a lot of the spoken dialogue.

RANDOM OBSERVATIONS:

The Venice setting and the aquatic creatures in the story bring to mind the Eleventh Doctor's adventure, Vampires of Venice.