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TARDIS Guide

Review of Castrovalva by Dastari

20 December 2024

This review contains spoilers!

I suppose I should chronicle my great Fifth Doctor rewatch with some reviews, as if my opinion matters in any way. Castrovalva was a bit of a letdown. I used to consider this the best post-regen story, but I didn't enjoy it nearly as much this time around. I think I remembered its best parts and didn't retain most of the weaker bits. And by "weaker bits" I pretty much specifically mean the location scenes.

I like the idea that the regeneration is a bumpy process that continues after the physical transformation, but I think they milked it just a little too much. In all honesty, I think The Twin Dilemma handled it better. The bit where he's flashing through old personalities was not as funny as the writers clearly thought it was. And then there's the Zero Cabinet. The Zero Cabinet just doesn't work. At first, you might think Davison was unavailable for the location filming, but then he pops his head out of the Zero Cabinet, meaning that wasn't the case. The Zero Cabinet looks stupid and looks even stupider on the wheelchair. Obviously the Doctor needs the Zero environment to help his regeneration, but since they're going to Castrovalva for that very purpose, Nyssa and Tegan could've just told him to suck it up and wheeled him in the chair directly. The Cabinet's logic doesn't make sense- the Doctor's supposed to be relaxing, but he needs to focus to remain levitating, which doesn't sound very relaxing to me. I'd imagine that's putting a lot of strain on his underdeveloped mental faculties, thus defeating the purpose of the Zero environment. They certainly don't need the Cabinet once they actually get to Castrovalva, or so I'd assume, and yet they make a big deal of it being the Doctor's property and have it delivered to his room. I suppose it does come into use towards the end when they trick the Master, but I think there were other ways this could have been written. The actual destruction of the Cabinet is not very effective. Anthony Ainley slowly tips it off the table and it falls apart, and the sound effects struggle to make this seem anything but lackluster. I'd like to give special mention to the bit where the wheelchair somehow ends up rolling into a small body of water, and Nyssa heads down to retrieve it but somehow slips and ends up in the barely knee-high water which she would have had to do anyway to reach the wheelchair and literally says "ew" in the climax to possibly the most unnecessary scene in all of the classic series. The location shoot from part two should've been excised almost completely, and much more of the story should've actually been set in Castrovalva.

On that note, Castrovalva itself is wonderful. It's the part of the story that I actually remembered, and it's good that I did. The story should've focused on this world a lot more, because it's a fabulous setting with a great guest cast. That's not to say the recurring cast is bad, of course. They're not on their A-game, but this is still one of my favorite TARDIS teams. Ainley's Master has settled into the cornier character we see him as for most of the decade, rather than the softer menace from Logopolis and Survival. That's fine by me; he's one of my favorite Masters, but I will miss his performance from Logopolis. I think Logopolis might've ruined Castrovalva for me. I really clicked with that story upon my rewatch, and it set a high bar that this story didn't quite meet. It's clear that this was a bit of a rush-job to replace the original premiere, although it's definitely not bad and I think Christopher Bidmead did a good job considering how short-notice it must have been. I think a lot of my love for this story came from the fact that my dad was tricked by the Shardovan red herring twice on two separate viewings, and had no clue that the Portreeve was actually the Master either time despite him appearing quite frequently in the first two parts.

What else? I didn't expect to have this much to say, honestly. I guess I'm really good at complaining. It's still a perfectly good story and the rest of the season more than makes up for a bumpy start. I like the bit with Adric in the mirror.