PIETRO: A hundred years of waiting. I can't imagine it.

DOCTOR: It isn't that long.

CHARLEY: Oh, here we go. The mysterious Doctor holds forth again about the nature of Time. Get

punting, Doctor.

DOCTOR: It, it, it isn't that long, really, a hundred years of solitude.

CHARLEY: Well, it would be for me. It would be for anyone if they had to wait that long for someone

to return. I hope you'd never abandon me like that, Doctor.

DOCTOR: Abandon you? No, and I wouldn't lose you in a game of cards either. Of course not. You're

my best friend.

(Walking in street.)

CHARLEY: So, it's not far off my time, 1938. I could get a boat home.

DOCTOR: You know, it's a constant puzzle to me why so many of my travelling companions can't wait

to leave me. I show them all the wonders of the Universe, and what thanks do I get.

'Hold on a sec,' Donna called back. 'Is this you?' She pointed up at the ceiling and laughed. 'But you're tiny!'

Hovering above them was a small ball of silver, with flashing lights and wires poking out all over. A tiny computer with a massive voice.

'Yes... well... that depends... er... it's all relative,' said Momus, defensively.

'You're relative all right, matey. Relatively small.'

RONE: Hello there. Hi. Nice to meet you. Officer Rone, Chief of Customs.

DOCTOR: (STRIDING IN) You’re in charge? I need some answers.

RONE: Sorry, has there been some mix up? You're not on my agenda.

DOCTOR: I am now.

‘Will you marry me?’ he repeated because Elizabeth was still just staring at him, one hand pressed against her chest, as if trying to contain a storm within.

It was, he conceded, a reasonable impersonation of strong emotion for an upright squid.

‘But I tortured you!’ she said.

‘Was there torture?’ he laughed, gaily. ‘I only noticed you.’

‘Yesterday, I nearly cut your head cut off.’

‘Oh, let’s not dwell on the past.'

GRAHAM: We ain't bags of oranges!

COSMO: You will be reprimanded most severely.

MISSY: Oh, Mister Cosmo, are you flirting with me?

COSMO: You stand for everything the Wardens abominate. You are wayward, chaotic, wilful...

MISSY: You are flirting.. I knew it. Say more nice things.

MISSY: Sorry, Missy. Going to have to love you and leave you. Mwah!

MISSY 2: Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. Mwah!

MISSY: Be you later.

(Vortex manipulator.)

MISSY: What a woman. I think I’ve got a bit of a lady-crush.

ALEYNA: But she’s you!

RYAN: If we bump into Dracula, just run, okay?

DOCTOR: If we bump into Dracula I'm gonna make him give me back my cape...

MISSY: One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi, four Missy-ssippi...

BERTRAM: You’re going to murder...

MISSY: ..five Missy-ssippi.

BERTRAM: ..hundreds of people just to get the attention of a woman who clearly isn’t interested?

MISSY: Seven Mississippi, eight Mississippi, nine Mississippi, ten Mississippi. Of course she’s interested. She’s obsessed with me. You can’t blame her, I’m hypnotic.

LUMIAT: Oh, Missy, always chasing after your beloved Doctor. You go looking for him, you seek him out. Why?

MISSY: I like to torture him.

LUMIAT: Oh, you like to torture yourself. You want what every sentient creature wants, but you don’t know it

yet. No, you just want to be loved.

Fallomax was floored. ‘Where did you …? What are you …?’

‘What am I? Right now? Hmm.’ The Doctor pretended to think

about it. ‘Angry. Yeah, angry about sums me up.’

RIVER: If I can get through one window, I can let us in. So, let me stand on your shoulders.

DOCTOR: You are not standing on my... You have been walking... Get off!

RIVER: Look, we need to know who Gerrard Pulman really is. We need to know if he’s turning pretty

jewellery into deadly weapons, and if so stop the chain reaction that he started three hundred years from

now.

DOCTOR: Yes, but in all those skirts you weigh considerably more than me.

RIVER: What?!

DOCTOR: So why can’t I stand on your shoulders?

RIVER: What?

DOCTOR: It’s a fair question.

RIVER: But... my hair.

DOCTOR: Oh, your hair.

RIVER: Yes! My hair.

DOCTOR: Right. A chain reaction of exploding jewellery and your hair.

RIVER: Oh, I don’t believe you.

DOCTOR: Well, good job this door’s open then, isn’t it?

RIVER: What? I really hate you sometimes.

DOCTOR: Don’t turn around. Whatever you do, River, don’t turn around.

RIVER: Why?

DOCTOR: Because you’ll be wasting your time. There’s nothing there.

RIVER: Ha, ha, ha. Very funny.

EIGHTH DOCTOR: You know, Edwards, it’s so very rare to meet someone who makes even less sense than I do.

EDWARDS: Thank you, sir.

TENTH DOCTOR: You’ve got a hat on your hatstand.

FIFTH DOCTOR: Well , yes.

TENTH DOCTOR: I can’t remember the last time I wore a hat.

FIFTH DOCTOR: So what do we do now?

TENTH DOCTOR: About a hat?

FIFTH DOCTOR: About the fact that Paris and quite possibly the Earth has been taken over by Cybermen?

TENTH DOCTOR: Oh yeah.