📝9/10

Thworping through time and space, one adventure at a time! 

"Swipe Right: A Modern Ninth Doctor Tale"

John Dorney’s Swipe Right launches the Star-Crossed set with a story that feels tailor-made for the Ninth Doctor era. Combining rogue technology with a satirical twist on modern dating culture, this tale transports us to Crell, where a mysterious Matchmaker app enforces connections—and punishes those who swipe left one too many times. It’s a brilliant premise that cleverly critiques societal pressures around relationships, weaving contemporary issues into a gripping sci-fi narrative.

The standout feature of this adventure is undoubtedly the unexpected pairing of the Ninth Doctor and River Song. Alex Kingston’s ever-charming portrayal of River brings a buoyant energy that perfectly contrasts Christopher Eccleston’s gruff, no-nonsense Doctor. Their dynamic is a joy to experience, with River’s playful flirtation clashing hilariously with Nine’s brusque dismissal of the notion that she could ever be his wife.

Dorney strikes gold in exploring their relationship: River adjusts her usual approach to fit this incarnation of the Doctor, and they work as equals to solve the mystery. The conversations between them, especially their discussions about love and connection, provide the heart of the story. It’s refreshing to see Nine confronted with such personal themes, highlighting his endearing discomfort with romance while revealing glimpses of his deeper humanity.

The supporting cast is equally memorable. Barclay and Nathaniel, the squabbling restaurant keepers, inject humour and warmth into the narrative, while Beth and Julien, who team up with Nine and River respectively, offer relatable perspectives on Crell’s dystopian relationship culture. Their stories enrich the central theme of individuality versus enforced connection.

From a pacing standpoint, Swipe Right balances its action-packed second half with quieter moments of introspection. Dorney’s script ensures the story remains engaging, blending tension, humour, and a few surprising twists. While the tale leans on familiar tropes surrounding AI and technology, its execution is so polished and entertaining that it feels fresh.

The production quality is top-notch, with dynamic soundscapes and performances that pull the listener into Crell’s unsettling world. The comedic beats land perfectly, and the narrative steadily builds tension, delivering a satisfying crescendo of revelations and resolutions.

Perhaps the most fascinating aspect of Swipe Right is how it uses its premise to explore the complexities of human relationships. It also underscores how awkwardly the Doctor fits into the realm of romance, further endearing this incarnation to listeners.

Final Thoughts:

While it may not push the boundaries of storytelling, Swipe Right is a quintessential New Who adventure: clever, heartfelt, and endlessly entertaining. It’s a perfect way to kick off the Star-Crossed set and a must-listen for fans of the Ninth Doctor and River Song alike.

I'm not a fan of audio books cos my brain is wired wrong for them, but I gave this one a go because the idea of Nine meeting River was a fascinating idea. I'll never get used to listening to audio books, but I found the story enjoyable, even though River's and Nine's interactions weren't quite as I hoped. What got me most in this story was the amazing and unexpected representation for the Ace and Aro orientation!

went in with high expectations and they were met! i love both of these characters so for them to finally meet was amazing. the chemistry and totally different shift in dynamic was really interesting and i can’t wait to hear it in the following stories. the supporting cast were great, the scene between beth and the doctor regarding asexuality was so so good

I have a few nitpicks, I think there are a few too many conveniences, a few scenes should’ve been cut, and Dorney’s emphasis on Moffat dialogue can get grating really fast, but overall this was a great listen. The 9DAs really struggle with characterizing 9. I often feel like Christopher Eccleston is playing the 6th Doctor or the 5th Doctor, whereas Swipe Right literally could not have been more fitted for the 9th Doctor. Alex Kingston is great as always, the supporting cast is good, this is a fun listen.

A really fun story about aromantism, asexuality and AI going horribly wrong! Its premise felt a bit similair to the film "Lobster" by Yorgos Lanthimos, but the film and this story are very different in their plots and execution, so that's alright. Overall, pretty excellent! I think I'm going to like this set, the dynamic between Ninth Doctor and River Song is certainly interesting