Partners in Crime

[Adipose Industries]

(Both the Doctor and that annoying, loud woman, Donna Noble, walk along different streets to the same glass fronted building. She goes into the main reception whilst he sonics his way in through a rear fire escape.)

RECEPTIONIST [OC]: Good morning, Adipose Industries.

(Donna shows an ID to the guard at the lifts.)

DONNA: Donna Noble, Health and Safety.

[Basement]

(The Doctor flashes his psychic paper at a guard he passes.)

DOCTOR: John Smith, Health and Safety.

[Lecture hall]

(A woman is giving a presentation to an audience of several dozen.)

FOSTER: Adipose Industries, the twenty first century way to lose weight. No exercise, no diet, no pain. Just lifelong freedom from fat. The Holy Grail of the modern age. And here it is. You just take one capsule. One capsule, once a day for three weeks, and the fat, as they say.

(The film takes over.)

NARRATOR [OC]: The fat just walks away.

(A woman in the audience speaks.)

PENNY: Excuse me, Miss Foster. If I could? I'm Penny Carter, science correspondent for The Observer. There are a thousand diet pills on the market, a thousand con men stealing people's money. How do we know the fat isn't going straight into your bank account?
FOSTER: Oh, Penny, if cynicism burnt up calories, we'd all be as thin as rakes. But if you want the science, I can oblige.

(Donna is also in the audience.)

NARRATOR [OC]: Adipose Industries. The Adipose capsule is composed of a synthesised mobilising lipase, bound to a large protein molecule.

[Projection room]

(This is where the Doctor is watching the presentation.)

COMPUTER: The mobilising lipase breaks up the triglycerides stored in the adipose cells, which then enter
DOCTOR: Health and Safety. Film department.

[Lecture hall]

FOSTER: One hundred percent legal, one hundred percent effective.
PENNY: But, can I just ask, how many people have taken the pills to date?
FOSTER: We've already got one million customers within the Greater London area alone, but from next week, we start rolling out nationwide. The future starts here. And Britain will be thin.

[Call centre]

(Mostly cold calling, by the sound of it.)

PEOPLE: Good morning. I represent Adipose Industries.

(Donna sits down next to a man in a cubicle.)

CRAIG: That's a three week course of pills for a special price of forty five pounds.
DONNA: (sotto) Donna Noble, Health and Safety. Don't mind me.

(The Doctor finds a young woman.)

CLARE: We deliver within three working days.
DOCTOR: (sotto) John Smith, Health and Safety. Don't mind me.
CRAIG: The box comes with 21 days worth of pills, a full information pack, and our special free gift, an Adipose Industries pendant.

(Donna looks at the pendant - a gold plated Adpiose pill. The Doctor does the same.)

CLARE: It's made of eighteen carat gold, and it's yours for free. No, we don't give away pens, sorry. No, I can't make an exception, no.
DONNA: I'll just need to keep this for testing. And I just need a list of your customers. Could you print it off?
CRAIG: I suppose so.
DONNA: Where's the printer?
CRAIG: Just over there, by the plant.

(Donna looks of the cubicle wall.)

DONNA: Which plant, that plant?
CRAIG: Yeah, that's the one.
DONNA: Lovely.

(She sits down, and up pops the Doctor.)

DOCTOR: That's the printer there?
CLARE: By the plant, yeah.
DOCTOR: Brilliant.

(Down he goes and up comes Donna.)

DONNA: Does it need a code? Last place I worked, the printer needed a code.
CRAIG: No, I can do it from here.

(They swap over.)

DOCTOR: Has it got paper?
CLARE: Yeah, Jimbo keeps it stocked.

(Miss Foster walks in with two guards.)

FOSTER: Excuse me, everyone, if I could have your attention.

(The workers stand.)

FOSTER: On average, you're each selling forty Adipose packs per day. It's not enough. I want one hundred sales per person per day. And if not, you'll be replaced. Because if anyone's good in trimming the fat, it's me. Now. Back to it.

(Miss Foster leaves and the workers sit down again.)

DOCTOR: Anyway, if you could print that off. Thanks.
DONNA: So if you could just print off that list, I'll get out of your way. Lovely. Thanks, then. See you.

(Donna heads for the printer. The Doctor stands then sits again as Clare gives him a piece of paper.)

DOCTOR: Thanks, then. Oh, what's that?
CLARE: My telephone number.
DOCTOR: What for?
CLARE: Health and Safety. You be health, I'll be safety.
DOCTOR: Ah. Ah. But that contravenes er, paragraph five, subsection C. Sorry.

(Donna collects the printouts and leaves. The Doctor walks behind her to the printer and looks for his copies, then returns to Clare.)

DOCTOR: Me again.

[Stacy's home]

DONNA: Stacy Campbell?
STACY: Who wants to know?
DONNA: My name's Donna. I represent Adipose Industries, and you're on the list of our valued customers.

[Roger's home]

DOCTOR: Mister Roger Davey? I'm calling on behalf of Adipose Industries. Just need to ask you a few questions.

[Stacy's home]

STACY: It's been fantastic. I've started the pills on Thursday. Five days later, I've lost eleven pounds.
DONNA: And no side effects or anything?
STACY: No, I feel fantastic. It's a new lease of life. Now, what do you think about these earrings. Do they work?
DONNA: Yeah, lovely.

[Roger's home]

ROGER: I've been on the pills for two weeks now. I've lost fourteen kilos.
DOCTOR: That's the same amount every day?
ROGER: One kilo exactly. You wake up, and it's disappeared overnight. Well, technically speaking, it's gone by ten past one in the morning.
DOCTOR: What makes you say that?
ROGER: That's when I get woken up. Might as well weigh myself at the same time.

[Stacy's home]

DONNA: You going on a date?
STACY: I'm doing the opposite. I'm dumping him. I can do better than him now. Right, I won't be long. If the taxi beeps, give me a shout.

[Roger's home]

ROGER: It is driving me mad. Ten minutes past one, every night, bang on the dot without fail, the burglar alarm goes off. I've had experts in, I've had it replaced, I've even phoned Watchdog. But no, ten past one in the morning, off it goes.
DOCTOR: But with no burglars?
ROGER: Nothing. I've given up looking.
DOCTOR: Tell me, Roger. Have you got a cat flap?

(That's a yes.)

ROGER: It was here when I bought the house. I've never bothered with it, really. I'm not a cat person.
DOCTOR: No, I've met cat people. You're nothing like them.
ROGER: It's that what it is, though? Cats getting inside the house?
DOCTOR: Well, thing about cat flaps is, they don't just let things in, they let things out as well.
ROGER: Like what?
DOCTOR: The fat just walks away.

[Stacy's home]

(Stacy is in the bathroom.)

STACY: Won't be long!
DONNA: Oh, that's all right.

(Donna takes the Adipose pendant out and examines it, then she twists it absentmindedly and Stacy's stomach growls. As Donna twiddles with the gold capsule, Stacey's abdomen moves around.)

[Miss Foster's office]

(An alarm goes off, and her computer screen shows the location. Miss Foster uses her wrist-watch communicator.)

FOSTER: We have unscheduled parthenogenesis.

[Roger's home]

DOCTOR: Well, thanks for your help. Tell you what, maybe you could lay off the pills for a week or so.

(The Doctor's three lobed gizmo beeps.)

DOCTOR: Oh. Got to go. Sorry.

[Miss Foster's office]

FOSTER: Send out the collection squad. Bring them home.

(A black van with sirens and lights speeds out of the Adipose Industries car park.)

[Stacy's home]

(A jelly-baby shaped creature breaks off from Stacy's abdomen and jumps into the bathroom sink.)

DONNA: You all right up there?
STACY: Yeah.

(The little creature looks up at her.)

[Miss Foster's office]

FOSTER: The Adipose has been witnessed. Activating full parthenogenesis.

(Miss Foster twiddles her own pendant.)

[Stacy's bathroom]

(Another creature pops out of Stacy's body, then gurgles and waves at her.)

STACY: What are you? What are you?

[Stacy's home]

(Donna is at the foot of the stairs.)

DONNA: I like what you've done with the hall. Stacy? Are you all right? I wouldn't mind a little visit myself. Everything all right in there?

(She knocks on the bathroom door.)

DONNA: It's only me. Do you mind if I pop to the loo? Stacy?

(Lots of lumps are moving around below Stacy's clothes.)

STACY: Oh, help me. Oh my God, help me!
DONNA: What is it, what's wrong?

(Stacy has bolted the door on the inside.)

DONNA: Stacy!

(Stacy screams then her clothes fall to the floor, and lots of little creatures run out. When Donna burst in, she sees the last one on the window sill. It waves at her and jumps.)

[Street]

(The Doctor is following the signal on his gizmo. He has to hit it a few times. The van arrives outside Stacy's home as Donna leaves by the back door and goes down the alleyway. The trail of knocked over dustbins tells her which way the creatures have gone. The men from the van have used butterfly nets to collect the creatures, put them into containers and then the back of the van. They drive away past Donna, and nearly knock down the Doctor. He starts chasing it. A taxi pulls up by Donna.)

DRIVER: Stacy Campbell?
DONNA: No, she's gone.
DRIVER: Gone where?
DONNA: She's just gone.
DRIVER: Oh, great. Thanks for nothing.

(He puts his For Hire sign back on and drives off. In the alleyway, mere yards from Donna, the Doctor loses the signal on his gizmo.)

[Miss Foster's office]

(Miss Foster is examining security footage on her computer screen.)

FOSTER: It seems we have a case of industrial espionage. One touch and the capsule bio-tunes itself to it's owner, but someone must have introduced a second raw capsule. Therefore, one of these people is a thief. There, oh yes, there she is. Now, what shall we do with her?

[Nobles' home]

(Donna goes inside, and her mother calls out.)

SYLVIA [OC]: And what time's this?
DONNA: How old am I?
SYLVIA: Not old enough to use a phone.

(A little later, Donna is sitting at the kitchen table with a mug of drink.)

SYLVIA: I thought you were only moving back for a couple of weeks. Look at you. I mean, you're never gonna find a flat, not while you're on the dole. And its no good sitting there, dressed up, looking like you're job hunting. You've got to do something. It's not like the 1980s. No one's unemployed these days except you. How long did that job with Health and Safety last? Two days, and then you walk out. I have other plans. Well, I've not seen them. And it's no good sitting there dreaming. No one's going to come along with a magic wand and make your life all better.
DONNA: Where is Granddad?
SYLVIA: Where do you think he is! Up the hill. He's always up the hill.

[Allotment]

(Granddad is the newspaper seller from Voyage of the Damned, and he has got a nice set-up in his allotment shed. There is also a small telescope and a camp stool nearby. Donna walks up with a thermos.)

WILF: Aye, aye. Here comes trouble.
DONNA: Permission to board ship, sir?
WILF: Permission granted. Was she nagging you?
DONNA: Big time. Brought you a thermos.
WILF: Oh, ta.
DONNA: You seen anything?
WILF: Yeah, I've got Venus, there with an apparent magnitude of minus three point five. At least, that's what it says in my little book.

(Donna puts a tarpaulin on the ground next to him.)

WILF: Here, come and see. Come on. Here you go. Right?

(Donna looks at the bright evening star.)

WILF: That's the only planet in the Solar System named after a woman.
DONNA: Good for her. How far away is that?
WILF: Oh, its about twenty six million miles. But we'll get there, one day. In a hundred years time we'll be striding out amongst the stars. Jiggling about with all them aliens. Just you wait.
DONNA: You really believe in all that stuff, don't you?
WILF: It's all over the place these days. If I wait here long enough.
DONNA: I don't suppose you've seen a little blue box?
WILF: Is that slang for something?
DONNA: No, I mean it. If you ever see a little blue box flying up there in the sky, you shout for me, Gramps. Oh, you just shout.
WILF: Do you know, I don't understand half the things you say these days.
DONNA: Nor me.
WILF: No, fair dos. You've had a funny old time of it lately. There was poor old what's his name, Lance, bless him, and that barmy old Christmas. I wish you'd tell us what really happened.
DONNA: I know. It's just, the things I've seen, sometimes I think I'm going mad. I mean, even tonight I was in a. Doesn't matter.
WILF: Well, you're not yourself, I'll give you that. You just, you seem to be drifting, sweetheart.
DONNA: I'm not drifting. I'm waiting.
WILF: What for?
DONNA: The right man.
WILF: Same old story. A man!
DONNA: No, I don't mean like that. But, he's real. I've seen him. I've met him, just once, and then I let him fly away.
WILF: Well, there you are. Go and find him.
DONNA: I've tried. He's nowhere.
WILF: Oi, not like you to give up. Do you know, I remember when you were about six years old, your mother said no holiday this year. So off you toddled, all on your own and you got on a bus to Strathclyde. Ha! We had the police after you and everything. Ha, where's she gone, then. Where's that girl, hey?
DONNA: You're right. Because he's still out there, somewhere. And I'll find him, Gramps. Even if I have to wait a hundred years, I'll find him.

[TARDIS]

(The Doctor is examining his version of the pendant through a magnifying glass.)

DOCTOR: Oh, fascinating. Seems to be a bio-flip digital stitch, specifically for

(Then he realises he only talking to himself.)

[Outside Donna's home]

(Sylvia comes out of the house wearing a dressing gown and hair curlers.)

SYLVIA: It's my turn for the car. What you need it for?
DONNA: A quick getaway.

[Call centre]

(Donna parks in an alleyway near Adipose Industries, and leaves. Then the TARDIS materialises nearby. They both enter the building as they did before.)

DONNA: Morning.

(The Doctor goes into a storage room and sonics the door locked. Donna settles herself in a cubicle in the ladies.)

FOSTER: Keep an eye out. She'll come back and then she's mine.
(The clock moves on from 9:30 to 6:10. The call staff are leaving and the lights are being turned out.)
CLARE: See you tomorrow.

(The Doctor comes out of his hiding place. Donna does the same, then goes back in to answer her phone.)

DONNA: (sotto) Not now.

[Nobles' home]

SYLVIA: I need the car. Where are you?

[Ladies toilets]

DONNA: I can't. I'm busy.

[Nobles' home]

SYLVIA: Why are you whispering?

[Ladies toilets]

DONNA: I'm in church.
SYLVIA: What are you doing in church?
DONNA: Praying.

[Nobles' home]

SYLVIA: Huh, bit late for that, madam.
WILF: What's she in church for?
SYLVIA: Hush, you. Go up the hill. But I need the car. I'm going out with Suzette. She's asked all the Wednesday girls. Apparently she's been on those Adipose pills. She says she looks marvellous.

[Ladies toilets]

(Miss Foster enters with armed guards.)

FOSTER: We know you're in here, so why don't you make this nice and easy and show yourself? I'm waiting. I warn you, I'm not a patient woman. Now, out you come. Right. We'll do it the hard way. Get her.

(The guards kick open the cubicle doors. The fifth one contains Penny the reporter.)

FOSTER: There you are.
PENNY: I've been through the records, Foster, and all of your results have been faked. There's something about those pills you're not telling us.
FOSTER: Oh, I think I'll be conducting this interview, Penny.

(They leave. Meanwhile, the Doctor comes out of the plant room onto the roof and gets into the window cleaner's cradle.)

[Call centre]

PENNY: You've got no right to do this. Let me go!

[Miss Foster's office]

(The Doctor lowers the cradle to Miss Foster's window. He ducks out of sight when they enter.)

PENNY: This is ridiculous.
FOSTER: Sit there.
PENNY: I'm phoning my editor.
FOSTER: I said sit.

[Outside the window]

(The Doctor uses a stethoscope to listen to the conversation.)

PENNY [OC]: You can't tie me up.

[Miss Foster's office]

PENNY: What sort of a country do you think this is?
FOSTER: Oh, it's a beautifully fat country. And believe me, I've travelled a long way to find obesity on this scale.
PENNY: So, come on then, Miss Foster, those pills. What are they?

(Donna has arrived at the secretary's station outside the office.)

FOSTER: Well, you might just as well have a scoop, since you'll never see it printed. This (a capsule) is the spark of life.
PENNY: And what's that supposed to mean?
FOSTER: Officially, the capsule attracts all the fat cells and flushes them away. Well, it certainly attracts them. That part's true. But it binds the fat together and galvanises it to form a body.
PENNY: What do you mean, a body?
FOSTER: I am surprised you never asked about my name. I chose it well. Foster. As in foster mother. And these are my children.

(She takes a little creature out of a drawer and puts it on the desk.)

PENNY: You're kidding me. What the hell is that?

(Donna and the Doctor both look through the windows.)

FOSTER: Adipose. It's called an Adipose. Made out of living fat.
PENNY: But I don't understand.
FOSTER: From ordinary human people.

(The Doctor and Donna see each other. Their conversation is totally silent.)

DOCTOR: Donna?
DONNA: Doctor? Doctor!
DOCTOR: But what? What? What?
DONNA: Oh my god!
DOCTOR: But how?
DONNA: It's me!
DOCTOR: Yes, I can see that.
DONNA: Oh, this is brilliant.
DOCTOR: What the hell are you doing there?
DONNA: I was looking for you.
DOCTOR: What for?
DONNA: I read it on the internet. Weird. Crept along. Heard them talking. Hid. You.

(Then she realises that Miss Foster is staring at her and the Doctor.)

FOSTER: Are we interrupting you?
DOCTOR: Run!
FOSTER: Get her.

(The Doctor zaps the office door with his sonic screwdriver.)

FOSTER: And him.

(The Doctor sends the cradle back up to the roof. Donna runs upstairs as the guards shoot the office door open. They run out, and Miss Foster follows.)

PENNY: What about me?

[Stairwell]

(The Doctor and Donna meet on the stairs and embrace.)

DONNA: Oh, my God. I don't believe it. You've even got the same suit! Don't you ever change?
DOCTOR: Yeah, thanks, Donna. Not right now.

(The guards are a few floors below.)

DOCTOR: Just like old times!

[Roof]

DONNA: Because I thought, how do you find the Doctor? And then I just thought, look for trouble and then he'll turn up.

(The Doctor sonics the door.)

DONNA: So I looked everywhere. You name it. UFOs, sightings, crop circles, sea monsters. I looked, I found them all. Like that stuff about the bees disappearing, I thought, I bet he's connected. Because the thing is, Doctor, I believe it all now. You opened my eyes. All those amazing things out there, I believe them all. Well, apart from that replica of the Titanic flying over Buckingham Palace on Christmas Day. I mean, that's got to be a hoax.
DOCTOR: What do you mean, the bees are disappearing?
DONNA: I don't know. That's what it says on the internet. Well, on the same site, there was all these conspiracy theories about Adipose Industries and I thought, let's take a look.

(The Doctor sonics the cradle controls.)

DOCTOR: In you get!
DONNA: What, in that thing?
DOCTOR: Yes, in that thing.
DONNA: But if we go down in that, they'll just call us back up again.
DOCTOR: No, no, no, because I've locked the controls with a sonic cage. I'm the only one that can control it. Not unless she's got a sonic device of her own, which is very unlikely.

[Plant room]

FOSTER: Out of my way.

(Miss Foster sonics open the door to the roof.)

[Roof]

(She looks down on the cradle.)

FOSTER: Oh. Oh, I don't think so.

(She sonics the controls. There are sparks and the cradle drops suddenly.)

[Window cleaning cradle]

(The Doctor manages to make the cradle stop.)

DOCTOR: Hold on. Hold on. We can get in through the window.

(He tries to sonically cut through the glass.)

[Roof]

FOSTER: Deadlock the building.

[Window cleaning cradle]

DOCTOR: Can't get it open!
DONNA: Well, smash it then!

(She finds a spanner and starts hitting the glass, which is designed nowadays to withstand a nearby bomb. Miss Foster aims her sonic pen at one of the steel cables. It starts to burn.)

DONNA: She's cutting the cable.

(The cable snaps, tipping Donna out. The Doctor manages to hang on.)

DOCTOR: Donna!

(Donna is dangling from the end of the cable.)

DONNA: Doctor!
DOCTOR: Hold on!
DONNA: I am! Doctor!

[Roof]

FOSTER: And now, for the other one.

(Miss Foster goes to the other side of the cradle mechanism and starts to sonic the remaining cable. The Doctor takes aim and blasts her pen out of her hand. It hurts.)

FOSTER: Ow!

[Window cleaning cradle]

(The Doctor catches the falling pen, puts it between his teeth and climbs to another window.)

DONNA: I'm going to fall!

[Miss Foster's office]

(Donna's legs are visible through the window.)

PENNY: What the hell is going on?

[Window cleaning cradle]

DONNA: This is all your fault. I should've stayed at home.

(The Doctor slides up the window.)

DOCTOR: I won't be a minute!

(He climbs inside.)

[Roof]

FOSTER: Yes, he's slippery, that one. Time we found out who he is.

[Miss Foster's office]

(The Doctor runs downstairs to the office and goes to the window.)

PENNY: Is anyone going to tell me what's going on?
DOCTOR: What are you, a journalist?
PENNY: Yes.
DOCTOR: Well, make it up.

(He unlocks the window and grabs Donna's legs.)

DONNA: Get off!
DOCTOR: I've got you. I've got you. Stop kicking!

(Miss Foster and the guards head downstairs. The Doctor pulls Donna inside.)

DONNA: I was right. It's always like this with you, innit?
DOCTOR: Oh, yes! And off we go.
PENNY: Oi!
DOCTOR: Sorry!

(The Doctor zaps Penny free from the door.)

DOCTOR: Now do yourself a favour. Get out.

[Call centre]

(The Doctor and Donna meet Miss Foster and her guards.)

FOSTER: Well, then. At last.
DONNA: Hello.
DOCTOR: Nice to meet you, I'm the Doctor.
DONNA: And I'm Donna.
FOSTER: Partners in crime. And evidently off-worlders, judging by your sonic technology.
DOCTOR: Oh, yes, I've still got your sonic pen. Nice. I like it. Sleek. It's kind of sleek.
DONNA: Oh, it's definitely sleek.
DOCTOR: Yeah, and if you were to sign your real name, that would be?
FOSTER: Matron Cofelia of the Five Straighten Classabindi Nursery Fleet. Intergalactic Class.
DOCTOR: A wet nurse, using humans as surrogates.
FOSTER: I've been employed by the Adiposian First Family to foster a new generation after their breeding planet was lost.
DOCTOR: What do you mean lost? How do you lose a planet?
FOSTER: Oh, politics are none of my concern. I'm just here to take care of the children on behalf of the parents.
DONNA: What, like an outer space super nanny?
FOSTER: Yes, if you like.
DONNA: So. So those little things, they're, they're made out of fat, yeah, but that woman, Stacy Campbell, there was nothing left of her.
FOSTER: Oh, in a crisis the Adipose can convert bone and hair and internal organs. Makes them a little bit sick, poor things.
DONNA: What about poor Stacy?
DOCTOR: Seeding a level five planet is against galactic law.
FOSTER: Are you threatening me?
DOCTOR: I'm trying to help you, Matron. This is your one chance, because if you don't call this off, then I'll have to stop you.
FOSTER: I hardly think you can stop bullets.

(The guards take aim.)

DOCTOR: No, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. One more thing, before dying. Do you know what happens if you hold two identical sonic devices against each other?
FOSTER: No.
DOCTOR: Nor me. Let's find out.

(They create an awful noise, that's what. Everyone except the Doctor grabs their heads in pain, and glass shatters nearby. Donna pushes his arm to stop him.)

DONNA: Come on!
FOSTER: I'm advancing the birth plan. We're going into premature labour.

[Miss Foster's office]

(Penny is collecting files for evidence.)

PENNY: Cellular ossification.
FOSTER: Tie her up.
PENNY: Oh, you're kidding me.

[Storage cupboard]

(The Doctor and Donna run to his hiding place. He throws out the ladder and mops.)

DONNA: Well, that's one solution. Hide in a cupboard. I like it.

(There is a big green machine behind the sliding back wall.)

DOCTOR: I've been hacking into this thing all day, because the matron's got a computer core running through the centre of the building. Triple deadlocked. But now I've got this, (her sonic pen) I can get into it.

[Miss Foster's office]

(Miss Foster opens her equivalent wall panel.)

PENNY: What does that thing do?
FOSTER: It's the inducer. We had planned to seed millions, but if that man's an alien, then he's alerted the Shadow Proclamation, and the first one million humans will have to do. Find him. And the woman. Don't waste time, just kill them.

[Storage cupboard]

DOCTOR: She's wired up the whole building. We need a bit of privacy.

(He holds to wires together and a forcefield stops the guards in their tracks.)

DOCTOR: Just enough to stop them. Why's she wired up the tower block? What's it all for?

[Miss Foster's office]

COMPUTER: Inducer online.

[Storage cupboard]

DONNA: You look older.
DOCTOR: Thanks.
DONNA: Still on your own?
DOCTOR: Yup. Well, no. I had this friend. Martha she was called. Martha Jones. She was brilliant. And I destroyed half her life. But she's fine, she's good. She's gone.
DONNA: What about Rose?
DOCTOR: Still lost. I thought you were going to travel the world?
DONNA: Easier said then done. It's like I had that one day with you, and I was going to change. I was going to do so much. Then I woke up the next morning, same old life. It's like you were never there. And I tried. I did try. I went to Egypt. I was going to go barefoot and everything. And then it's all bus trips and guidebooks and don't drink the water, and two weeks later you're back home. It's nothing like being with you. I must have been mad turning down that offer.
DOCTOR: What offer?
DONNA: To come with you.
DOCTOR: Come with me?
DONNA: Oh yes, please.
DOCTOR: Right.
COMPUTER: Inducer activated.
DONNA: What's it doing now?
DOCTOR: She's started the programme.

[Miss Foster's office]

COMPUTER: Inducer transmitting.
FOSTER: Mark the date, Miss Carter. Happy birthday. One million birthdays.

[De Rossi's wine bar]

(Sylvia and her friends are sitting round a table, drinking. Could It Be Magic is playing in the background.)

SUZETTE: I swear, that Adipose treatment is fabulous. Just look at my chin. And it's very good for fat. I'm down two sizes.
SYLVIA: It's like a miracle. All that from just one little pill.
SUZETTE: And I've been eating like normal.

(Suzette starts twitching and growling.)

SYLVIA: You all right, love?
SUZETTE: Yeah, I'm just. Just. Funny sort of feeling, like

(Another woman's companion is also uncomfortable.)

WOMAN: What's happened?
MAN: I'm not sure. It just seems to be
SUZETTE: Better pop to the loo.

(As Suzette stands, Sylvia sees the lump moving on her back.)

SYLVIA: Oh, my God. Suzette!
SUZETTE: What?

(Roger has lumps forming on him as well.)

SUZETTE: What is it? Get it off me!

(Sylvia pulls down the back of Suzette's blouse to reveal an Adipose. They are popping out of people all over the restaurant. One comes out of Roger, waves and jumps through the cat flap. Sylvia chased Suzette's baby out into the street, where a taxi runs over some of them with a squelch. There are thousands, all heading in the same direction.)

[Miss Foster's office]

FOSTER: Come to me, children. Come to me.

[Street]

POLICEWOMAN: All right, everyone get back. Don't touch them. Keep away from the road.

[Storage cupboard]

DOCTOR: So far they're just losing weight, but the Matron's gone up to emergency pathogenesis.
DONNA: And that's when they convert
DOCTOR: Skeletons, organs, everything. A million people are going to die. Got to cancel the signal.

(He dismantles the pendant.)

DOCTOR: This contains a primary signal. If I can switch it off, the fat goes back to being just fat.

(He attaches part of the pendant to the inducer.)

[Miss Foster's office]

FOSTER: A nice try. Double strength.

[Storage cupboard]

COMPUTER: Inducer increasing.
DOCTOR: No, no, no, no, no. She's doubled it. I need. Haven't got time. It's too far. I can't override it. They're all gonna die!
DONNA: Is there anything I can do?
DOCTOR: Sorry, Donna, this is way beyond you. Got to double the base pulse, I can't.
DONNA: Doctor, tell me. What do you need?
DOCTOR: I need a second capsule to boost the override, but I've only got the one. I can't save them

(Donna holds up her pendant. He pulls it apart and plugs it in. The inducer shuts down.)

[De Rossi's wine bar]

SUZETTE: It's stopped. They've gone.
MAN: Oh, thank god for that.

[Miss Foster's office]

(Miss Foster fiddles with the crankshaft of the inducer.)

PENNY: What's happened?
FOSTER: I think the Doctor happened. But we've still given birth to ten thousand Adipose. And the nursery is coming.

[Storage cupboard]

(There is a loud noise in the sky.)

DONNA: What the hell was that?

[Miss Foster's office]

FOSTER: It's my lift home.
PENNY: You can't just leave me here!

[De Rossi's wine bar]

SUZETTE: It just stopped.

(They hear the noise.)

SYLVIA: What on Earth is it now? Oh, my god.

(She goes outside again to see a big round CE3-style spaceship flying over the city. On his allotment, Wilf has his headphones on, listening to Dusty Springfield singing 24 Hours From Tulsa, and misses the whole thing as it passes behind him.)

[Storage cupboard]

(The spaceship stops over Adipose Industries, and the babies wave at it.)

DONNA: Fine. When you say nursery you don't mean a crche in Notting Hill.
DOCTOR: Nursery ship.

(The computer lights up again.)

COMPUTER: Incoming signal.
VOICE [OC]: (alien)
DONNA: Hadn't we better go and stop them?
DOCTOR: Hang on. Instructions from the Adiposian First Family.

[Outside Adipose Industries]

FOSTER: Children. Oh, my children, behold. I am taking you home.

(The Adipose cheer.)

FOSTER: Far across the galaxy, your new mummies and daddies are waiting. And you will fly.

(Blue beams come down from the spaceship.)

FOSTER: Up you go, babies. Up you go!

(The Adipose walk into the beams and float upwards.)

FOSTER: That's it. Fly away home.

[Storage cupboard]

DOCTOR: She's wired up the tower block to convert it into a levitation post. Ooo. Oh. We're not the ones in trouble now. She is!

[Outside Adipose Industries]

FOSTER: Take me. The children need me.

[Roof]

DONNA: What you going to do then? Blow them up?
DOCTOR: They're just children. They can't help where they come from.
DONNA: Oh, that makes a change from last time. That Martha must've done you good.
DOCTOR: She did, yeah. Yeah. She did. She fancied me.
DONNA: Mad Martha, that one. Blind Martha. Charity Martha. I'm waving at fat.
DOCTOR: Actually, as a diet plan, it sort of works. There she is!

(Miss Foster is floating upwards, too, below the little Adipose. She stops at roof level.)

DOCTOR: Matron Cofelia, listen to me.
FOSTER: Oh, I don't think so, Doctor. And if I never see you again, it'll be too soon.
DOCTOR: Oh, why does no one ever listen. I'm trying to help. Just get across to the roof. Can you shift the levitation beam?
FOSTER: What, so that you can arrest me?
DOCTOR: Just listen. I saw the Adiposian instructions. They know it's a crime, breeding on Earth. So what's the one thing they want to get rid of? Their accomplice.
FOSTER: I'm far more than that. I'm nanny to all these children.
DOCTOR: Exactly! Mum and Dad have got the kids now. They don't need the nanny anymore.

(The levitation beam switches off. Miss Foster does a Wile E Coyote double take in mid-air, then falls with a scream and a splat. The spaceship flies away.)

[Brook Street]

(The Doctor throws the sonic pen into a waste bin. Penny comes along, still tied to the chair.)

PENNY: Oi, you two. You're just mad. Do you hear me? Mad! And I'm going to report you for madness.
DONNA: You see, some people just can't take it.
DOCTOR: No.
DONNA: And some people can. So, then. TARDIS! Come on.

[Alleyway]

DONNA: That's my car! That is like destiny. And I've been ready for this.

(The boot is full of suitcases.)

DONNA: I packed ages ago, just in case. Because I thought, hot weather, cold weather, no weather. He goes anywhere. I've gotta be prepared.

(She unloads the boot into the Doctor's arms.)

DOCTOR: You've got a, a hatbox.
DONNA: Planet of the Hats, I'm ready. I don't need injections, do I? You know, like when you go to Cambodia. Is there any of that? Because my friend Veena went to Bahrain, and she. You're not saying much.
DOCTOR: No, it's just. It's a funny old life, in the TARDIS.
DONNA: You don't want me.
DOCTOR: I'm not saying that.
DONNA: But you asked me. Would you rather be on your own?
DOCTOR: No. Actually, no. But the last time, with Martha, like I said, it, it got complicated. And that was all my fault. I just want a mate.
DONNA: You just want to mate?
DOCTOR: I just want a mate!
DONNA: You're not mating with me, sunshine!
DOCTOR: A mate. I want a mate.
DONNA: Well, just as well, because I'm not having any of that nonsense. I mean, you're just a long streak of nothing. You know, alien nothing.
DOCTOR: There we are, then. Okay.
DONNA: I can come?
DOCTOR: Yeah. Course you can, yeah. I'd love it.
DONNA: Oh, that's just

(They almost hug.)

DONNA: Car keys.
DOCTOR: What?
DONNA: I've still got my mum's car keys. I won't be a minute.

(Donna runs off. The Doctor starts lugging her bags into the TARDIS.)

[Brook Street]

(Donna phones her mother.)

DONNA: I know, Mum. I saw it. Little fat people. Listen, I've got to go. I'm going to stay with Veena for a bit.
SYLVIA [OC]: It was in the sky!
DONNA: Yeah. I know. Spaceship. But, I've still got the car keys. Look. There is a bin on Brook Street, about thirty feet from the corner. I'm going to leave them in there.
SYLVIA [OC]: What, a bin?
DONNA: Yes, that's it. Bin.

(The same bin the Doctor threw the pen into?)

SYLVIA [OC]: But you can't do that.
DONNA: Oh, stop complaining. The car's just down the road a bit. Got to go. Really. Got to go. Bye.
SYLVIA [OC]: But Donna, you can't

(Donna goes over to some people by the police barriers and speaks to a blonde.)

DONNA: Listen, there is this woman that's going to come along. A tall blond woman called Sylvia. Tell her that bin there, all right? It'll all make sense. That bin there.

(Donna leaves. The blonde turns around to face us. It is Rose Tyler. She walks away and disappears.)

[TARDIS]

DONNA: Off we go, then.
DOCTOR: Here it is. The TARDIS. It's bigger on the inside than it is on the outside.
DONNA: Oh, I know that bit. Although frankly, you could turn the heating up.
DOCTOR: So, whole wide universe, where do you want to go?
DONNA: Oh, I know exactly the place.
DOCTOR: Which is?
DONNA: Two and a half miles that way.

[Allotment]

(Wilf is packing up for the night when he sees the TARDIS flying nearby.)

WILF: There! Donna, it's, it's the flying blue box!

(He looks through his telescope and sees Donna waving from the TARDIS door.)

WILF: What? That's Donna. Yeah, that's Donna.

(The Doctor waves, too.)

WILF: And that's him. That's him. Hey, that's him! Ha, ha, ha! Go on, gal! Go on, get up there! Hey!

Transcript originally provided by Chrissie. Adapted by TARDIS.guide. The transcripts are for educational and entertainment purposes only. All other copyrights property of their respective holders.

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