Lies

ROMANA: Oh, Wynter, what am I going to do with you?

WYNTER: Call me Soggy-Boggy like everyone else.

ROMANA: I beg your pardon?

WYNTER: Uh- nothing. Uh- Madam. Uh- Madam President. It was just a name they, um, called me. At the Academy. They thought I was wet.

ROMANA: Yes, I’m sure. Well, we all got unpleasant nicknames at the Academy. I got used to mine. Why didn’t you get used to Soggy-Boggy?

LEELA: How far now, K9?

K9: Query, mistress?

LEELA: How far have we walked, K9, below the Capitol?

K9: Do you require the measurements in inches, feet, metres, spammers, trigons–

LEELA: Enough, K9.

K9: We have come, in your own terms, mistress, a long way down.

LEELA: I wonder how long we’ve been away from them.

K9: If you require the time lapse in your own terms, mistress, we have been walking for quite some time.

BRAXIATEL: I do what I do for the benefit of Gallifrey. You are the best President it has had for… well, for a very, very long time.

ROMANA: I doubt this is over. Narvin will make capital of it, I’m sure.

BRAXIATEL: So will others. We’ll weather the storm.

ROMANA: This is going to be a trying time. For both of us. I’m glad you’re on my side. I feel we might have a chance.

BRAXIATEL: My President flatters me.

K9: Something has happened to Leela. Apparently, she has vanished. Literally.

ROMANA: When you say literally, K9, I assume you’re not talking figuratively. I find people who use the word literally when they don’t mean it literally very annoying.

K9: Leela has literally vanished, mistress.

LEELA: No. The spirit told me you would come.

ROMANA: Oh, come on.

LEELA: Do not mock me, Romana. You should know by now I am rarely wrong about such things.

ROMANA: Granted, you’re rarely wrong with your instincts, but… as for rational explanations of what you feel, well, that’s another story.

LEELA: You do not believe me?

ROMANA: I believe you that something is here alright. Just not that it’s a spirit, evil or otherwise.

LEELA: I never said it was evil.

ROMANA: Oh, well, I just assumed. I mean, they usually are with you.

K9: This unit does not have feelings, mistress.

LEELA: That is untrue, K9. Many times you and the other K9–

K9: Neither K9 unit possesses feelings, mistress.

LEELA: You should not be afraid of your feelings, K9.

ROMANA: Yes, thank you. If we can move on from the emotional support group session?

NARVIN: Braxiatel.

BRAXIATEL: Yes?

NARVIN: Thank you.

BRAXIATEL: Oh, don’t mention it. I mean that. To no one. I couldn’t bear the shame.

NARVIN: Of what?

BRAXIATEL: Saving your neck.

LEELA: Why did you shoot Narvin, K9? Not that I’m complaining.

K9: Pandora was only active by piggy-backing the brainwaves of an exceptionally intelligent Time Lord.

BRAXIATEL: Hence his lack of sleep. If Narvin had slept, Pandora’s power would have closed down. She must have accessed him ages ago.

ROMANA: Or, like me, it might be inherited, waiting for the right moment.

LEELA: I do not know which shocks me most, Romana. That you had a previous life, or that Narvin is considered one of the most intelligent Time Lords.