DORIAN: Day after day, this is our routine. Tom keeps me company as we sit together, trawling endlessly through countless papers and magazines in search of clues. Anything that may indicate where Natalie is…or my portrait. If I’m honest, I’m surprised he stayed around this long. The hold I had over him was ten years at best. No, I must confess that in spite of myself…I’m beginning to enjoy his company.

TOM: Old tobacco warehouse in shortage to be saved thanks to—

DORIAN: Useless.

TOM: Council to build hedgehog highway—

DORIAN: I think not.

TOM: Queen to visit Australia after—

DORIAN: No, no, wait, go back one. What did you say?

TOM: Oh, the hedgehog highway? (chuckles) I think that’s a lovely idea, don’t you? We have this family of hedgehogs in our garden…